Hurtful Words All Over Again.

He's done it again... He's said more of those hurtful words to me... 

We were talking on MSN yesterday afternoon. He then asked me, if he had ever lied to me about anything. I told him that I didn't know on the spot. I told him to give me some time to think about it. He stupidly responded with '5 minutes?' '10 minutes?' I was like thinking to myself, 'What the hell!? Just leave me alone and stop asking me stupid questions!' But instead, I told him that I needed more than that. He then told me I was annoying, so I said 'Fine. I'll shut up then.' He then said, "Your annoying when u shut up as well." And that totally got me going (crazy). I asked him what he wanted me to do then. He said to let him punch me. I automatically responded with "EFF NO I WILL." He then goes, 'you will?' I mean of course I wouldn't! In his dreams he could. 

He decided later on that I was a two-faced person. Especially to guys. I asked him why. He said, "when u meet new people listen to yourself. And then you will know. Yeah u don't. But u make people think that way. hint two-faced." I asked him, "So your saying I'm two-faced?" He then gave me the most hurtful sentence/explanation to me, "I said that ages ago. You may fool some people, but not all of them. Just coz u got hurt by Jh doesn't mean u do the same to others. Maybe Jh cheated on u for good reason. Maybe he realized your two-faced act. Maybe not. But whatever it is Q, u change once u know the inside of a guy." To me, that was the most hurtful thing that he has ever said to me, I didn't mind (a lot) that he called me a two-face, but putting Jh into the conversation was absolutely uncalled for! It totally struck me on my most sensitive nerve/spot. I was extremely upset and angry at him that moment. And I guess I still am. 

I mean, he's saying that it's MY fault that Jh cheated on me?! That NOTHING was Jh's fault!? Well, sorry. But I think you don't know the full story (about me and Jh) to talk about me (and him) like that. G pisses me off just like that. He talked to me today. Buh I much rather him not to. Coz I just want to be alone - without him around! I don't  want to see him, talk to him or whatever else there is that has to do with him! 

That day, I really wanted to tell J about this, but I couldn't. Coz he would ask me all sorts of questions and I wouldn't be in the mood of telling him. I was on the bus.. trying so hard to hold back all my tears - angry and upset tears. G always does this - with or without realizing it. But the thing is, he never seems to regret what he has ever said to me. He said he was terribly sorry. But really? I wouldn't know. Only he would. He told me last Thursday night (via text), that he is not 'physical unless I get in a fight, which I don't start. Or someone comment about my mama, then I fight. But I am really sorry Q, we have all done something that we are not proud of. And for me, one of it was offending you. I'm terribly sorry. When I'm angry I want a hug from that person....' I decided to ignore the fact that he had said sorry. 

Then, a couple of days later, we were texting at night, we got into the conversation,

 something about him and finding girlfriends and what not. He told me that "It's been like this for 4 years aye. All the girls that I like run away when they find out my anger issues. It f***s me off man. I even lost you. Lol.' When he said that, I automatically said to him, then why don't you NOT be angry? But I don't think he answered that question. And anyways, I don't get how he lost me, when I'm still his friend and still talk to him and stuff. He's just ... stupid... ><