Day 2 Without You

So Day 2 without K getting even harder. Like when I missed the bus today for work, I just managed to burst into tears and started thinking up things like, how, without him, I'm so lost and can't do anything without him. And how much I miss him.

But when I got to work, as I was working, I just started to think that, maybe I should stop thinking about him all the time. If I get my mind off him, and think about other things, like getting distracted from thinking about him. When I'm distracted, I tend to not think about him that much and I feel much much better. I want to be the girl I was before. Independant and not having to rely on a guy, like all the time. I can rely on myself. I don't need a man to be able to live on. It's sad. I know. But what can I do? I don't want to seem like I'm that kind of girl that's desperate for a man's love and attention. And seem like I can't do without my guy. That's just uncool and yeah.

I mean, not that I won't think about him. But just that I won't think about him that much, so I don't get all emotional. I don't want to get all emotional thinking about him all the time. I need to distract myself from thinking about him. I need FRIENDS! So I can hang out with them, and think less of him. I think it is best if I don't see him that often, so that I don't have to see him leave again and be all emotional all over again. And talking on the phone may cause me to miss him more, coz I love his voice and will definitely miss it when we hang up or when he is unable to talk to me on the phone.

But I definitely miss him like crazy and wish to see him everyday, every second and minute. But I know I can't. Then again, I'm sure that this long-distance will help make our relationship stronger. And like what I've been told, "If it's meant to be. It's meant to be. You cannot force it."

So.. Then again, it's all up to fate to decide whether we were meant to be together or not.. But I DO hope we are meant to be together -forever :) I love him so much. And miss him to pieces too!