Suddenly I feel so sad. After last night's texting-time with K. I don't know why.. But I feel.. unhappy in a way... What's killing me?
I think it may be the dream that I had lat night? Or was it the night before? Like, I dreamt that I was holding hand with ANOTHER guy and at the same time, I was thinking about K. I don't know why... But like I felt so bad. Even when I woke up, I felt so bad, I kept thinking about it. It felt like I had cheated on K already, even before we are together. Oh this is so bad.
But at least, now I know, I truely like K, and K only. No one else. And I would NEVER intend or think about cheating on him with another guy OR think about another guy like the way I do to him.
I also dreamt that he was going to com back in September!! Man! I was like NOOO! And refused to listen to the rest of it (on my dream). But then he texted me this afternoon saying that he will come back next month. I was soo relieved.
Aww! I miss him so much. I want him to come back now :(
Friday, July 2, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
All Smiles
This afternoon, when I walked into my room after washing my hair, I saw a parcel on my bed. It was in a box. From K. I was sort of in a rush to go out so I did everything and got ready before I opened it.
When I did open it, the first thing I saw was a piece of paper which on it, he wrote that he was sorry for the delay and that he should've given this to me in person, but this took time. I was like, aww! And then I looked further into it. I saw this "Me to you" [teddy bear] key ring! The teddy bear was holding a blanket. It was so cute! I put that with the rest of my soft toys on the side of my bed. And then the next thing was I saw a nice pretty pink box and underneath there was a pink envelope.
In the envelope was a card, a birthday card. There was this bit where he wrote that he was sorry that he couldn't be there for my birthday but he will be there for my birthday next year, and the next and the next and forever.
It was so sweet. The whole time that I was opening and reading everything, I smiled the whole way through. He is just so sweet! I wish there was another word to describe him with more than the word "sweet" but there isn't. Not that I can think of anyways (haha).
And yesterday afternoon, as we were talking, we ended up talking about having kids together. (random, I know). And considering the fact that me and him aren't even going out yet, it's strange but funny. And was such an intersting topic to talk about with him.
I found out that he wants a boy and a girl -just like me! And that he also wants twins -just like me, again! I was like to him, wow, it's so freaky that we think so alike all of a sudden. And then he was like, it must be fate for us to be together. And I just laughed and smiled at that. It's amazing that there IS someone out there who thinks if not the same, similar to me. I'm so surprised and amazed at the same time! He said that he only wanted to have babies with me, coz he knows that they will be the most beautiful children in the world. I was like AWW! So cute! (although we are not even going out yet or enganged haha) but still cute. Not many guys think about marriage -BEFORE they even go out! (haha).
Aww! He makes me miss him more and more by the day. I want to hug him and be in his arms soo bad!! I want him to come back to PN SOON!! I want to see him!!
When I did open it, the first thing I saw was a piece of paper which on it, he wrote that he was sorry for the delay and that he should've given this to me in person, but this took time. I was like, aww! And then I looked further into it. I saw this "Me to you" [teddy bear] key ring! The teddy bear was holding a blanket. It was so cute! I put that with the rest of my soft toys on the side of my bed. And then the next thing was I saw a nice pretty pink box and underneath there was a pink envelope.
In the envelope was a card, a birthday card. There was this bit where he wrote that he was sorry that he couldn't be there for my birthday but he will be there for my birthday next year, and the next and the next and forever.
It was so sweet. The whole time that I was opening and reading everything, I smiled the whole way through. He is just so sweet! I wish there was another word to describe him with more than the word "sweet" but there isn't. Not that I can think of anyways (haha).
And yesterday afternoon, as we were talking, we ended up talking about having kids together. (random, I know). And considering the fact that me and him aren't even going out yet, it's strange but funny. And was such an intersting topic to talk about with him.
I found out that he wants a boy and a girl -just like me! And that he also wants twins -just like me, again! I was like to him, wow, it's so freaky that we think so alike all of a sudden. And then he was like, it must be fate for us to be together. And I just laughed and smiled at that. It's amazing that there IS someone out there who thinks if not the same, similar to me. I'm so surprised and amazed at the same time! He said that he only wanted to have babies with me, coz he knows that they will be the most beautiful children in the world. I was like AWW! So cute! (although we are not even going out yet or enganged haha) but still cute. Not many guys think about marriage -BEFORE they even go out! (haha).
Aww! He makes me miss him more and more by the day. I want to hug him and be in his arms soo bad!! I want him to come back to PN SOON!! I want to see him!!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
My "Dream" Guy
Remember how last night he asked me who I liked and I told him that this special person changed the way I think about love and relationships etc.? Yeah, well it seems like he really has no clue that this special guy is him!! You don't know how much I wanted to like yell out to him that the "dream guy" was HIM!! OMGOSH!! ><
I like gave him "hints" telling him, that I want and am waiting for my "dream guy" to ask me face-to-face -that is IF he asks. So yeah, and then he told me that if my "dream guy" rejects me coz he (K) told me to go for it, he (K) said that he'd still be waiting for me. I was like aww! But I told him that if he doesn't go for the girl he wants, and just sits there doing nothing, then the girl that he wants will get taken by some other guy.
He said that it's true. And told me to wait for him to ask me. I was like 'Haha. Ok.' Then he was like, what if by the time I come back, and I see you with your dream guy? I was thinking to myself, 'Yeah, and that guy would be you. Hahaha!!' But I didn't say that, I just said to him, I'd wait for him and to not worry about me accepting from my "dream guy".
He asked me why I didn't go for it [with my dream guy] and I was like, I don't ask guys out, I like it the traditional way. Guy ask girl. And that if he does find another girl, then I will be fine with it. Though I'd be sad inside. He said that, if I liked some other guy and was going out with him, he wouldn't mind, coz he knows that I am in his heart and that if I'm happy, he's happy. That was soo touching.
Oh I love him so much. I don't know so much about love, but I know that, no matter how much I think about him, I will not get sick of him. I mean, yeah, sometimes I do get sick of thinking about him. I think it's mainly because of the fact, that I can't see him and like remember his face. It's so hard! I try so hard to remember his face -like clearly, not a blurry and unclear vision.
I keep thinking back to that last night that we hugged for such a longggg time when I was in Auckland. That was the best memory of us together so far. Such a good memory. When I think about him a lot, and all the things he said and texted me, I start to miss him SOOO much, that I start to have tears swelling up in my eyes :'( I want to hug him, I want to be in his arms like that night again. I miss him -so bad...
I like gave him "hints" telling him, that I want and am waiting for my "dream guy" to ask me face-to-face -that is IF he asks. So yeah, and then he told me that if my "dream guy" rejects me coz he (K) told me to go for it, he (K) said that he'd still be waiting for me. I was like aww! But I told him that if he doesn't go for the girl he wants, and just sits there doing nothing, then the girl that he wants will get taken by some other guy.
He said that it's true. And told me to wait for him to ask me. I was like 'Haha. Ok.' Then he was like, what if by the time I come back, and I see you with your dream guy? I was thinking to myself, 'Yeah, and that guy would be you. Hahaha!!' But I didn't say that, I just said to him, I'd wait for him and to not worry about me accepting from my "dream guy".
He asked me why I didn't go for it [with my dream guy] and I was like, I don't ask guys out, I like it the traditional way. Guy ask girl. And that if he does find another girl, then I will be fine with it. Though I'd be sad inside. He said that, if I liked some other guy and was going out with him, he wouldn't mind, coz he knows that I am in his heart and that if I'm happy, he's happy. That was soo touching.
Oh I love him so much. I don't know so much about love, but I know that, no matter how much I think about him, I will not get sick of him. I mean, yeah, sometimes I do get sick of thinking about him. I think it's mainly because of the fact, that I can't see him and like remember his face. It's so hard! I try so hard to remember his face -like clearly, not a blurry and unclear vision.
I keep thinking back to that last night that we hugged for such a longggg time when I was in Auckland. That was the best memory of us together so far. Such a good memory. When I think about him a lot, and all the things he said and texted me, I start to miss him SOOO much, that I start to have tears swelling up in my eyes :'( I want to hug him, I want to be in his arms like that night again. I miss him -so bad...
Monday, June 28, 2010
New Job and All
So today was my first day working at Valleygirl in the Plaza. And what I can tell you, is that it was absolutely FUN! I totally loved it. I got to dress up mannequins! That's like a dream come true! Felt like I was a stylist! Love that feeling! xD I soo cannot wait till the next time I work there - which is this Thursday! But first of all, I still need to write my resignatio letter to McDonalds hahaha. Oh dear. How I'm gonna miss everybody there :( But the girls at Valleygirl are awesome and so damn friendly as well. So doesn't really matter about leaving McDonalds, right? Considering we weren't all that close anyways. But I'll still miss them and I still love McDonalds!!
Anyways! The whole time that I was working, besides thinking about where everything goes and gathering all the information that my store manager (SM) gave me and told me, I thought about K. Oh, he is totally my motivator! Thinking about him gives me the motivaton to do good and to be happy and all smiley. Though one thing today that even thinking about K didn't work, was seeing H. Gosh. I felt like so annoyed seeing him today. Like, I don'tknow why, but I just soo did not want to see or talk to him aye.
But I just pretended that it was nothing and told him I'm OK for like the 100th time! But that's not the point. So I finished @ 5pm and got a text from K at 2.05pm and I got so excited (haha) but then I knew that he would be working about that time.So I had to wait aaaggeess for him to text me back.
He asked me who I liked, and I told him that it was a secret. But I'd tell him when he comes back to PN. And told him that before I didn't like anyone, but this person changed me. (And obviously, this person is him. himself -but he doesn't know yet hehe). He asked me how this person changed me and said that this person must be special [to me].
I mean, yes. He did change me. For a start, I don't go checking out all the guys around me and thinking of them as potential boyfriend's and all. I only have eyes for him. My heart belongs to him, and him only. Coz before, when I like someone, I still go checking out other guys and thinking, "Hmm... He's not bad. He could be on my list too!" And develop a crush on another guy and then another -if there is another one and so on. But for K, there's something about him that made me think of him, and just him only. Like coz of him, I have finally made up my mind and settled in/on for smebody rather than finding potentials coz this guy doesn't have this in him and that guy doesn't havewhat that guy has in him etc. So, that's one thing and the most important thing that he changed about me.
He also made me think differently on the word/s 'love' or 'liking someone'. Like... When you like someone, you like thm for who they are and accepting them for who they are. I mean, yes, I know he's not the mos good-looking guy out there and certainly not the tallest. But hey! I have totally accpeted that and obviously, looks AREN'T everything. It's the inside that counts. And I guess coz of his 'mysteriousness' I want to like be a huge part of his world and like to find thigns out about him, which makes this... "excitement" so good, I guess?
And he also has changed the way I think, when it comes to doing things for others. Coz usually I wouldn't put that one guy, in first place and think "anything for him" plus a smile. It would always be "Oh who caresss.... It's only a guyyy....!" And shrug it off. But now, not only is he the only guy on my mind all the time, he is also the guy that I put in first place (besides family and all).
I guess there are other things. But these are the ones I can think of now. And the first point is the most important in ANY [love] relationship. To love that person, and only that person. And I'm glad he could get me to change my mind like that -without him even noticing. He sure has the power! (haha).
Anyways! The whole time that I was working, besides thinking about where everything goes and gathering all the information that my store manager (SM) gave me and told me, I thought about K. Oh, he is totally my motivator! Thinking about him gives me the motivaton to do good and to be happy and all smiley. Though one thing today that even thinking about K didn't work, was seeing H. Gosh. I felt like so annoyed seeing him today. Like, I don'tknow why, but I just soo did not want to see or talk to him aye.
But I just pretended that it was nothing and told him I'm OK for like the 100th time! But that's not the point. So I finished @ 5pm and got a text from K at 2.05pm and I got so excited (haha) but then I knew that he would be working about that time.So I had to wait aaaggeess for him to text me back.
He asked me who I liked, and I told him that it was a secret. But I'd tell him when he comes back to PN. And told him that before I didn't like anyone, but this person changed me. (And obviously, this person is him. himself -but he doesn't know yet hehe). He asked me how this person changed me and said that this person must be special [to me].
I mean, yes. He did change me. For a start, I don't go checking out all the guys around me and thinking of them as potential boyfriend's and all. I only have eyes for him. My heart belongs to him, and him only. Coz before, when I like someone, I still go checking out other guys and thinking, "Hmm... He's not bad. He could be on my list too!" And develop a crush on another guy and then another -if there is another one and so on. But for K, there's something about him that made me think of him, and just him only. Like coz of him, I have finally made up my mind and settled in/on for smebody rather than finding potentials coz this guy doesn't have this in him and that guy doesn't havewhat that guy has in him etc. So, that's one thing and the most important thing that he changed about me.
He also made me think differently on the word/s 'love' or 'liking someone'. Like... When you like someone, you like thm for who they are and accepting them for who they are. I mean, yes, I know he's not the mos good-looking guy out there and certainly not the tallest. But hey! I have totally accpeted that and obviously, looks AREN'T everything. It's the inside that counts. And I guess coz of his 'mysteriousness' I want to like be a huge part of his world and like to find thigns out about him, which makes this... "excitement" so good, I guess?
And he also has changed the way I think, when it comes to doing things for others. Coz usually I wouldn't put that one guy, in first place and think "anything for him" plus a smile. It would always be "Oh who caresss.... It's only a guyyy....!" And shrug it off. But now, not only is he the only guy on my mind all the time, he is also the guy that I put in first place (besides family and all).
I guess there are other things. But these are the ones I can think of now. And the first point is the most important in ANY [love] relationship. To love that person, and only that person. And I'm glad he could get me to change my mind like that -without him even noticing. He sure has the power! (haha).
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Confession
He confessed to me last night. Like finally!! The moment that I have been waiting for! Even though he told me through text. It was just so touching and made me feel so special to him.
So I told him about that girl acussing me of trying to 'steal' her boyfriend. He gave me a lot of advice and solutions to solve this problem. I mean, even he felt it was strange that the girl suddenly asked if we could be friends. But the sad thing was, that talking about this bought him back some very painful memories. I felt so bad when he told me that. I wanted to help him through it. But knowing that he won't tell and 'bring up the past' is going to be hard. He apologized that he couldn't be here for me. And said that he was happy that I told him about this problem but he couldn't do anything to ake me happy again.
He's so sweet. He concuded that it was the guy's fault for talking to another girl instead of his girlfriend. I asked him, is it wrong to talk with the opposite sex if you are in a relationship. He gave me this very good and satisfying answer, Which was, "What I think is that when in a relationship, both male and female shout meet each others friends. One way it shows that they are in a relationship infront of friends. Second show the other friends that might have and interest in him or her that he or she is already taken. And all that could eliminate jealousy between the two when tlking to the opposite sex." I really like this explaination. I then asked him, what if the couple lived in different places? Like one live in Auckland and the other live in PN? Then how will they be able to meet each others friends? He then replied with another satisfying answer. "Then you should have photos taken together. Then they will understand."
I guess with all his answers are satisfying to me, coz this is probably something that I have been wanting to hear from someone else other than myself. Coz now I know, that there is someone else who thinks like me (when in a relationship).
Then he tells me, "You know, I can see you have a lot of males that have fallen for you, because of your openess, attractiveness, kindness, caringness." I was like, "Whoa, how did you know?? Like how can you tell?" He then said, "You really want to know?" And of course I told him that I did [want to know]. He replied with "Because you are who you are." I got a bit confused with that, so I asked him what that meant. He then said, "Do you remember sometime ago. When I asked you, How come you don't have a boyfriend? You reply you don't want one yet. Do you remember that?" I was like, yeah... But what does that got to do with anything? (Answering my question).
He then repeated the question of 'You really want to know, don't you?' I told him once again, I did want to know. He replied with a :) and I was like... literally dot dot dot + - _ -; face (haha). But I just told him that it doesn't answer my question and that he should tell me coz I wanted to know. So he then replied with a full answer. A very good answer. I loved it. Which was:
"I know you have a lot of male problems because I also have fallen for you. I don't know when it happened, but every time I see you my heart beats fast, and when I don't se you I think of you. I wanted ask you to give me a chance, give us a chance. But I'm afraid of losing you and the bond between us. And also your reply to the question."
After reading that, I felt SOO touched. Like, it was happy as well as surprised. My eyes started to swell up tears. Tears of happiness not sadness. I just couldn't stop smiling. My face turned all red. I mean, just imagine him telling me this face-to-face. I'd be so.. embarassed -but in a good way. If you know what I mean. I replied if he wanted to know the truth and the answer. He replied that he was afraid. I told him to to be afraid and that if he wanted, I'd tell him the answer and the truth whenever he is ready. He said that he is happy that im here for him when he is unhappy and sad. I told him that, I have already told him that I will always be here for him. Always. He told me that I was sweet and that he didn't want to lose me. I said to him that he would never lose me. And to trust me on that. He just replied that he he misses me right now. I was like AWW! Miss you too! And I mean it.
Then he said that he's going to sleep now coz the more he talks to me the more he misses me. And that he needs to control this feeling because if one day, I leave him, he will lose everything. I felt so sad to hear that. I didn't want to leave him. I wanted him to text me day and night (when possible). I don't want him to control his feelings. I want it to grow like the feelings that I have for him too.
But now he knows that I will ALWAYS be here for him. No matter what. He promised me that he will tell me everything that is on his mind. Whether it's happy things or unhappy things. I just want to be there for him and want him to know that I will always be here for him, whenever he feels lonely or sad and needs someone that he can turn to and comfort him or share his happiness with.
I'm so happy that he doesn't want to lose the bond that we have as well. Coz like I said before, I want to keep our bond and make it stronger rather than having it to be distanced again and having to 'rebuild' that closeness again.
That whole time, all I wanted was him to be right with me. I wanted to hug him and lean on him. I can't wait till he comes back to PN. Though I know it will be a while... Like maybe in July/August. That is such a long wait... I want to see him right now and talk to him. I want to be with him. I just want him.. So bad.. I miss him so much. I hope he won't forget about me too much during the next couple of months. Coz I know I won't. He's changed me. And he, is the only one in my heart.
So I told him about that girl acussing me of trying to 'steal' her boyfriend. He gave me a lot of advice and solutions to solve this problem. I mean, even he felt it was strange that the girl suddenly asked if we could be friends. But the sad thing was, that talking about this bought him back some very painful memories. I felt so bad when he told me that. I wanted to help him through it. But knowing that he won't tell and 'bring up the past' is going to be hard. He apologized that he couldn't be here for me. And said that he was happy that I told him about this problem but he couldn't do anything to ake me happy again.
He's so sweet. He concuded that it was the guy's fault for talking to another girl instead of his girlfriend. I asked him, is it wrong to talk with the opposite sex if you are in a relationship. He gave me this very good and satisfying answer, Which was, "What I think is that when in a relationship, both male and female shout meet each others friends. One way it shows that they are in a relationship infront of friends. Second show the other friends that might have and interest in him or her that he or she is already taken. And all that could eliminate jealousy between the two when tlking to the opposite sex." I really like this explaination. I then asked him, what if the couple lived in different places? Like one live in Auckland and the other live in PN? Then how will they be able to meet each others friends? He then replied with another satisfying answer. "Then you should have photos taken together. Then they will understand."
I guess with all his answers are satisfying to me, coz this is probably something that I have been wanting to hear from someone else other than myself. Coz now I know, that there is someone else who thinks like me (when in a relationship).
Then he tells me, "You know, I can see you have a lot of males that have fallen for you, because of your openess, attractiveness, kindness, caringness." I was like, "Whoa, how did you know?? Like how can you tell?" He then said, "You really want to know?" And of course I told him that I did [want to know]. He replied with "Because you are who you are." I got a bit confused with that, so I asked him what that meant. He then said, "Do you remember sometime ago. When I asked you, How come you don't have a boyfriend? You reply you don't want one yet. Do you remember that?" I was like, yeah... But what does that got to do with anything? (Answering my question).
He then repeated the question of 'You really want to know, don't you?' I told him once again, I did want to know. He replied with a :) and I was like... literally dot dot dot + - _ -; face (haha). But I just told him that it doesn't answer my question and that he should tell me coz I wanted to know. So he then replied with a full answer. A very good answer. I loved it. Which was:
"I know you have a lot of male problems because I also have fallen for you. I don't know when it happened, but every time I see you my heart beats fast, and when I don't se you I think of you. I wanted ask you to give me a chance, give us a chance. But I'm afraid of losing you and the bond between us. And also your reply to the question."
After reading that, I felt SOO touched. Like, it was happy as well as surprised. My eyes started to swell up tears. Tears of happiness not sadness. I just couldn't stop smiling. My face turned all red. I mean, just imagine him telling me this face-to-face. I'd be so.. embarassed -but in a good way. If you know what I mean. I replied if he wanted to know the truth and the answer. He replied that he was afraid. I told him to to be afraid and that if he wanted, I'd tell him the answer and the truth whenever he is ready. He said that he is happy that im here for him when he is unhappy and sad. I told him that, I have already told him that I will always be here for him. Always. He told me that I was sweet and that he didn't want to lose me. I said to him that he would never lose me. And to trust me on that. He just replied that he he misses me right now. I was like AWW! Miss you too! And I mean it.
Then he said that he's going to sleep now coz the more he talks to me the more he misses me. And that he needs to control this feeling because if one day, I leave him, he will lose everything. I felt so sad to hear that. I didn't want to leave him. I wanted him to text me day and night (when possible). I don't want him to control his feelings. I want it to grow like the feelings that I have for him too.
But now he knows that I will ALWAYS be here for him. No matter what. He promised me that he will tell me everything that is on his mind. Whether it's happy things or unhappy things. I just want to be there for him and want him to know that I will always be here for him, whenever he feels lonely or sad and needs someone that he can turn to and comfort him or share his happiness with.
I'm so happy that he doesn't want to lose the bond that we have as well. Coz like I said before, I want to keep our bond and make it stronger rather than having it to be distanced again and having to 'rebuild' that closeness again.
That whole time, all I wanted was him to be right with me. I wanted to hug him and lean on him. I can't wait till he comes back to PN. Though I know it will be a while... Like maybe in July/August. That is such a long wait... I want to see him right now and talk to him. I want to be with him. I just want him.. So bad.. I miss him so much. I hope he won't forget about me too much during the next couple of months. Coz I know I won't. He's changed me. And he, is the only one in my heart.
Friday, June 25, 2010
I Don't Want Your Boyfriend
(Another enty -Again)
So this afternoon, when I logged onto my FB account. I had recieved 5 [private] messages. One was from my friend Y and the other was from H (the annoying and clingy guy...) and the other THREE!! Was from this random girl that I don't even know but have seen her on my one of my guy friend's [FB] page. The first was like from yesterday at 2.04pm saying that, "I like Al Y OK!" Then again, this morning, she sent another 2 saying, "Hello. I don't know why Al Y always talk to you, we have been together for a little while. But anyway." And the second one saying, "I hope that you and Al Y can stop contact with each other."
I replied one of her messages, saying, "Hi, Are you his girlfriend?" She replied with, "He is my boyfriend now." And I was like, "But you guys have the same last name...?" She then asked, "Who are you? Is Al your boyfriend before?" I answered with, "I don't know how to answer your first question. But no. Al and I are just friends. And have known each other for quite a long time." She then replied, "So sorry about that. Can we be friends?" Like oh man?? What does she want from me?? Does she really want to be friends or like keep an eye on what me and her "boyfriend" is talking about?? Oh. I'm not sure about saying yes to her....
Is that how I should take care of things?? I HATE these kinds of situations. Where the this random girl comes along and accuse you of stealing her boyfriend. Like, dude. Calm down. I don't want your boyfriend, alright? And I don't intend on 'stealing' or 'taking' him away from you. Don't worry.
Arrgh! I hate situations like these!! I want K!! I don't want anyone else but him! And plus, Al is wayyy too old for me. K is just right for me :) Should I tell K about this? Or na? Well... I guess I'll tell him if he asks me if 'anything interesting happened today,' again. So yeah.. Maybe... ARGGGH! I don't want to be the "That bitch who is trying to steal my boyfriend"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGH!
So this afternoon, when I logged onto my FB account. I had recieved 5 [private] messages. One was from my friend Y and the other was from H (the annoying and clingy guy...) and the other THREE!! Was from this random girl that I don't even know but have seen her on my one of my guy friend's [FB] page. The first was like from yesterday at 2.04pm saying that, "I like Al Y OK!" Then again, this morning, she sent another 2 saying, "Hello. I don't know why Al Y always talk to you, we have been together for a little while. But anyway." And the second one saying, "I hope that you and Al Y can stop contact with each other."
I replied one of her messages, saying, "Hi, Are you his girlfriend?" She replied with, "He is my boyfriend now." And I was like, "But you guys have the same last name...?" She then asked, "Who are you? Is Al your boyfriend before?" I answered with, "I don't know how to answer your first question. But no. Al and I are just friends. And have known each other for quite a long time." She then replied, "So sorry about that. Can we be friends?" Like oh man?? What does she want from me?? Does she really want to be friends or like keep an eye on what me and her "boyfriend" is talking about?? Oh. I'm not sure about saying yes to her....
Is that how I should take care of things?? I HATE these kinds of situations. Where the this random girl comes along and accuse you of stealing her boyfriend. Like, dude. Calm down. I don't want your boyfriend, alright? And I don't intend on 'stealing' or 'taking' him away from you. Don't worry.
Arrgh! I hate situations like these!! I want K!! I don't want anyone else but him! And plus, Al is wayyy too old for me. K is just right for me :) Should I tell K about this? Or na? Well... I guess I'll tell him if he asks me if 'anything interesting happened today,' again. So yeah.. Maybe... ARGGGH! I don't want to be the "That bitch who is trying to steal my boyfriend"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGGGH!
Falling Deeper?
I think I am falling deeper and deeper in "love". Although we're not in a relationship yet. I feel that everything that he says to me, is really getting to me. And make me like -or love him more than I had expected... I hope this is a good thing though. And I hope he feels the same way too.
He texted me last night just before midnight. I was waiting for him to text me for the WHOLE night! I thought he would've went to sleep at about 9.15pm coz that was when he slept on Wednesday night. I was like shocked and happy that he texted me. Sort of like a dream come true. Coz you know how I was hoping that we'd be able to talk everyday so that we don't lose our "connection"? Yeah, that's why I was so happy and relieved.
He was so sweet last night. He made me smile so much that my face hurt (haha). I told him that I asked my older cousin, W what she thought of him. And he asked me why I asked and asked me what the result was. I told him that she said he was OK and that it was the first time that she EVER told me that a guy that I introduce to her or have been introduced to her, was OK. Coz usually she'd get all fussy and be like na. Not good etc etc. And so I asked if he felt special. He said yes he did feel special and asked if I was trying to sell him. Haha.
I told him that I wasn't unless he really wanted me to. Then he asked me, "Then what do you think of me?" I wanted to tell him straight up, but I just decided to ask him whether he wants to know it in one word or like a list. Heasked, "Is it not good?" I replied that it was good. He told me to tell him and I just repeated whether he wanted it short or long. He then replied saying that I can tell him when he comes back to PN. I was like, "OK! Then I'll tell you when you come down." Then he said, "That's if you remmeber all the words." And after that sentence, he said that he forgot to give me a kiss when I was up in Auckland. I was like aww! Always next time. Haha. I told him that I wrote everything in my blog and so I won't forget and he said he wanted to read and know my 'secrets' but I told him none of my friends can read my blog.
After all that, i asked him how he wanted me to remind him to ask me [what I like about him], he was like, "I don't know, maybe you can give me a kiss instead. Haha. :O I will be very happy." I smiled reading that. HE then said that if I kissed him then he will instantly kiss me back. I was like AWWW! Made me want to be with him right then.
Then he said he was going to sleep now. "Because you are not here now. Only ay to see you is in my dream. So I will meet you in my dream. Good night and sweet dreams Q." And I was like AWW!! He's just so cute and adorable AND sweet at the same time! I love him sooo sooo much. Maybe not so much "love" more like I like him A LOT! Coz you know, can't 'love' him and fall deeper and deeper if nothing's gonna happen. I don't want to get hurt like that.
So, what exactly DO I like about my dearest K? (Hehe).
I like:
> How he is so respectful to older people. (Like my grandparents for example).
> How he doesn't hesitate to do things. (Like how my friends told him to get this and do that when we were at the Japanese Restaurant and how he drove us around without complaining. Coz knowing that a lot of guys or just people in general would be moaning and complaining).
> How he has self-confidence. (About his height. He doesn't let it get to him, whether people make fun of his height or not).
> The way he holds me, hugs me, puts his arm around me. (It makes me feels so comfortable and warm with him).
> How he sweet talks me, but not in a over the top kind of way. Like wayyyy too cheesy way. So cheesy that I need to vomit.
> How he can hang out with me and my girl friends without isolating himself from my girls or like sticking to me like glue when I'm with him and my girls. (Knowing that some guys DO do that. And that's annoying).
> How he can drive! :D he looks so cool when he drives! And when he 'speeds' -like on the motorway or on the way to Wellington or Auckland. That's hot ;D
> His style! It's not like gangsta or too boring. It's simple and casual and nice. I like it.
Whoa. There is a lot that I like about him... Haha. I wonder if I'll remember to tell all this to him. It's such a long and a pretty detailed list, don't cha think? Haha. I need to also ask him what HE thinks of ME! :D
All I want is to be in an relationship with him. It sounds so desperate. But I want him by my side. And I want to be by his side. Forever. and Always.
He texted me last night just before midnight. I was waiting for him to text me for the WHOLE night! I thought he would've went to sleep at about 9.15pm coz that was when he slept on Wednesday night. I was like shocked and happy that he texted me. Sort of like a dream come true. Coz you know how I was hoping that we'd be able to talk everyday so that we don't lose our "connection"? Yeah, that's why I was so happy and relieved.
He was so sweet last night. He made me smile so much that my face hurt (haha). I told him that I asked my older cousin, W what she thought of him. And he asked me why I asked and asked me what the result was. I told him that she said he was OK and that it was the first time that she EVER told me that a guy that I introduce to her or have been introduced to her, was OK. Coz usually she'd get all fussy and be like na. Not good etc etc. And so I asked if he felt special. He said yes he did feel special and asked if I was trying to sell him. Haha.
I told him that I wasn't unless he really wanted me to. Then he asked me, "Then what do you think of me?" I wanted to tell him straight up, but I just decided to ask him whether he wants to know it in one word or like a list. Heasked, "Is it not good?" I replied that it was good. He told me to tell him and I just repeated whether he wanted it short or long. He then replied saying that I can tell him when he comes back to PN. I was like, "OK! Then I'll tell you when you come down." Then he said, "That's if you remmeber all the words." And after that sentence, he said that he forgot to give me a kiss when I was up in Auckland. I was like aww! Always next time. Haha. I told him that I wrote everything in my blog and so I won't forget and he said he wanted to read and know my 'secrets' but I told him none of my friends can read my blog.
After all that, i asked him how he wanted me to remind him to ask me [what I like about him], he was like, "I don't know, maybe you can give me a kiss instead. Haha. :O I will be very happy." I smiled reading that. HE then said that if I kissed him then he will instantly kiss me back. I was like AWWW! Made me want to be with him right then.
Then he said he was going to sleep now. "Because you are not here now. Only ay to see you is in my dream. So I will meet you in my dream. Good night and sweet dreams Q." And I was like AWW!! He's just so cute and adorable AND sweet at the same time! I love him sooo sooo much. Maybe not so much "love" more like I like him A LOT! Coz you know, can't 'love' him and fall deeper and deeper if nothing's gonna happen. I don't want to get hurt like that.
So, what exactly DO I like about my dearest K? (Hehe).
I like:
> How he is so respectful to older people. (Like my grandparents for example).
> How he doesn't hesitate to do things. (Like how my friends told him to get this and do that when we were at the Japanese Restaurant and how he drove us around without complaining. Coz knowing that a lot of guys or just people in general would be moaning and complaining).
> How he has self-confidence. (About his height. He doesn't let it get to him, whether people make fun of his height or not).
> The way he holds me, hugs me, puts his arm around me. (It makes me feels so comfortable and warm with him).
> How he sweet talks me, but not in a over the top kind of way. Like wayyyy too cheesy way. So cheesy that I need to vomit.
> How he can hang out with me and my girl friends without isolating himself from my girls or like sticking to me like glue when I'm with him and my girls. (Knowing that some guys DO do that. And that's annoying).
> How he can drive! :D he looks so cool when he drives! And when he 'speeds' -like on the motorway or on the way to Wellington or Auckland. That's hot ;D
> His style! It's not like gangsta or too boring. It's simple and casual and nice. I like it.
Whoa. There is a lot that I like about him... Haha. I wonder if I'll remember to tell all this to him. It's such a long and a pretty detailed list, don't cha think? Haha. I need to also ask him what HE thinks of ME! :D
All I want is to be in an relationship with him. It sounds so desperate. But I want him by my side. And I want to be by his side. Forever. and Always.
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