MEN.....!!

So there are mainly two "guy problems" that I have. And one of them does NOT involve my boyfriend.

The first problem is, R. So he likes me. Or loves me. Whatever. But he told his dad that. I was like, Oh my God. You gotta be kidding me! But he said that he can tell his dad everything so yeah... He said that he will come back to PN in mid-October. And if he cannot find a job from now till December. He will go back to HK forever and won't be coming back to NZ. It's sad to heat that. Although it's not like I'm "begging" him to stay and all. But you know, when someone so close to you, leaves and you won't be able to see them, till who knows when, is quite saddening.

I really do hope that he finds a job. I mean, I don't need to see him. Just even talking to him on FB or via text is fine with me. But like, if he was in NZ, it would be easier to communicate with him. he even cried to his dad [on the phone] that he's not going to focus on finding a girlfriend at the moment, and concentrate on finding a job right now. And that things have changed, considering I have a boyfriend now and all. It was really sad when he said that he cried. Coz usually, the R I know, doesn't get so emotional that easily. Always has a smile on his face and is always happy. So hearing that, it was quite sad and I got quite worried about him. But he said he was fine. Which I really hope he is. But he's always looking on the positive side anyways. So I'm sure he'll be fine :)

And the other reason that he doesn't want to leave NZ is coz of his ex-girlfriend.She's in a bit of a state. And I can see that he does care for her, even though he keeps complaining about her and 'bad-mouthing' her to me.

Second problem "male problem" is H obviously. Man, I seriously don't understand him. He private messaged me on FB again, telling me to read his blog, titled "Fireworks" and saying that 'fireworks = happiness/happy' and I was like, erm. OK...? And at the bottom, he wrote that he's not implying or saying that he doesn't want to be friends or that he's saying goodbye forever. He's just expressing his feelings. So I read his blog as usual. And this is what he wrote:

"Dear friend

Everything was way too short... as if absolutely nothing happened. Only one or two shots went off, yeah..

But you know, to me, it was a beautiful display of fireworks. It was enough for me I believe. I wanted the show to go on for longer, and to see more fireworks occur. However, if you didn't want to keep the show going, then I will just have to enjoy what was given by you. I will never forget these couple shots of fireworks. It was short, but they were definitely good.

Thank you for your time and this wonderful show of fireworks. I'm sorry for being so rude, to ask you to make the show longer. I will go find another person who can show me something better. Forgive me. Good night.

H"

So that's what he said. I mean, I don't get why he would say, "I will go find another person who can show me something better" Coz to me, that sounds like, he is going to find someone that he is going to annoy.. No offence, but that's just what it sounds like.

Either way, I don't know if he is truly, 100% over this whole situation [that involves me] so yeah... I just hope is is and will be soon. Coz I want to be able to talk and hang out with him like we use to, before he started liking me more than a friend and constantly repeating his words and expressions of his feelings towards me. Coz not only is it annoying me, but it's annoying the people around him too. Like R and my sister. So... I do hope he gets back into reality and just get over it.

And I never said that I didn't want to be his friend, from the start, I have said to him that I will be here if he needs me and that I want to keep begin his friends. But at this point, I cannot be friends with him. Well, I am still his friend, but like, you know, I can't really talk to him coz then I may give him the wrong impression again or giving him hope that something may happen. So.. it's best to talk to him when he's 100% over this situation...