Hmm... So lately, as you would have known, me and H has been talking a lot. And yes, he has said before that he won't give up and that he will try to make me like him/have those feelings for him (somewhere along those lines anyways), and like, I never knew that this day would ever come... I though I'd never ever think of him this way and actually.. like him? Oh I don't even know whether I acutally like him or not!!
Like, he sweet talks a lot to me, and in a way, I take it in, and I like feel really happy deep down whenever he says it to me. He makes me smile.But then again, I know I have said that about a lot of other guys. OK. Maybe not "a lot!" but like, quite a few guys that I actually like.. Or liked before?
Arrggh! I don't know! i think about us going out, like, as a couple, and being exposed to the world. I mean, I think about everything? Like, to what we do as a couple to what will happen when we break up. Most importantly, what my mum and his 'people' (e.g. his aunty, mom, cousin) thinks. I mean, if we ever break up, would they go holding a grudge against me -or my mom?? I just hope that day will never come. But I wouldn't want to carry on a relationship if it's coz I don't want others to think of us badly. And in a way, I don't want to lose another 'good' opportunity.
Like, with my 'ex' J. So yeah... Sort of regret I never actually go out with him (couple-wise), though, it's just a LITTLE bit of regret. Not like a whole lot. I'm just real confused rightnow. I mean, I keep thinking about "other options." Am I greedy? Selfish? I dunno. Whatever.
I guess, that 'quote' that I read from this magazine is right. Something about, taking the opportunity to do what you want, is better than to, regret it (for the rest of your life) coz you did not take the opportunity. I think I will live by this now. Let me go and find that quote again. And write it out nicely... haha. Hope I'll be able to find it again.
I don't want to be playing along with him and make him fall so deep into this "trap" that he can't get out of it... Just like Je. I mean he's liked me for about 1 year or 2. And people still thinks he likes me. And yet he's got a girlfriend. So yeah... Wouldn't want H to go through that as well....
I'll have to think about it VERY VERY deeply and CAREFULLY. Don't want to make a wrong move. Though time waits for no one...
No comments:
Post a Comment